Friday, February 5, 2010

Too much for words - Part two

Hello my faithful followers,
Here is part two.... for those of you who missed part one - you can read it here.

I'm new at this blogging thing, and am trying to make my posts "flow" together as well as possible, but this is my first time doing a multi-part post, so bare with me if it's a bit lumpy.

So I had just started telling you all about how my uncle and I were starting to get closer and realize some of our similarities in hobbies/talents.

We performed together at a tribute to Slovak Jewish Poetry (I sang, he played the guitar) I also tried to become a bit involved in the theater that he, my parents and their friends were involved in.  I started to loosen up around him.  I tried to help him decorate his new condo - even though my decorating guru's and teachers told me to never work for family (and they were right; that was a slightly trying experience... We spent 6 hours at IKEA picking out window treatments for his bedroom, only to have him return them the next day because they just weren't 'right'. Much more frustrating because I hadn't charged by the hour due to the fact that he is family)

He seemed to start trying too at this point.  He started living his life. His new condo was the first normal thing he had done in a long time.  Before, he had been living an eccentrically "bare" life. Void of ALL things material. Even though he had more than enough money (he's very intelligent and makes good money) he lived in a crappy apartment, never bought himself any 'luxury' items (ie. FURNITURE! A BED!?!?). Even to this day, his 'new'(8 months) condo has only a bed frame and mattress pad(I have NO clue how he slept like that) with some drawers & a dining room table & chairs. No couch. No rugs. Nothing on the walls.  And he seemed to really not mind. He began to reach out to my mom again, through the poetry and the theater, I got involved too and enjoyed working with him on his amazing songs.  I will upload some soon so you can hear.  It's not in english but still quite beautiful melodically. His poetry is unlike anything I have ever heard.  He's actually writing a song right now (about me... flattered but don't know how to handle the emotion, as usual).  The lyrics are amazing. His brain works a very interesting way, even now in his weakened state. He's a total free spirit and very spiritually gifted.  I have always (even through the hard times) admired that in him.

And here came the biggest fail our little family has experienced to date.  He was in Slovakia with the theater group preforming their latest production. This was the trip of a lifetime - him and his sister together in their homeland again. And they were also traveling to Israel together for the play. This was a huge deal for them all. My parents have not been back to Israel since the summer of 1968 when the Russians occupied Czechoslovakia while they were there on a summer student trip and they were not allowed to return home. (That story is actually what the play that they were there to perform was based on.) This was an amazing experience for them to share.  But tragedy struck - they were out for a group meal and he fainted.  He was taken to the hospital where they diagnosed him with Glioblastoma. Then he was flown home, and I was "the only family he had"(my mom's words) in Canada, so I tried to help organize his medical stuff.  But he pushed me away, and told me, not to visit him in the hospital.  I mostly ignored him and went anyways for the most part but it was hard.  The hospital had the audacity to send him home after a day or two of observation.  And he fainted again.  And this time he never got back up.

My parents stayed to finish the rest of the theater's tour, and came home a few weeks later, and his condition got really bad for a while. My mom never saw him standing again after that.   For about 2 months the doctors were telling us he only had 24-48 hours to live.  It was really insane.  That went on for a while, but then he started to get more stable.

This was the start of the summer. His condition has since stabilized considerably.  Meaning, he is still dying, he is still completely paralyzed on the left side of his body, but there is no "deadline" now.
As horrible as it sounds, it is almost harder this way.  He is not living right now.  He's a beautiful mind stuck in a useless body. And he's starting to not realize that - his mind is refusing to admit that his body doesn't serve him anymore.

Part three coming tomorrow. 

4 comments:

  1. This is quite sad...so sorry you are dealing with this on top of everything else. I think it's so beautiful that he wrote you a song! ~mymiracles77 (Stress Free Infertility)

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  2. I am excited to read the song that he is writing for you. I can imagine how difficult it is for you to deal with all of this. From an outsider looking in, it almost seems like he doesn't know how to truly let people into his life intimately. He is blessed to have you as a niece.

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  3. Thank you both for your kind words.
    Whenever I get responses to this series of posts it really tugs my heart strings.
    So great to have met such supportive people!

    <3

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  4. Goodness, I'm so sorry. It's awful that you had been the only one to take care of him when he was brought back to Canada. That must have been very tough. But you seem like a strong woman.

    I hope we're able to read the song he's written about you. :)

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