Fresh Start?

 

In my last post I expressed the desire to start anew, flip over the 'ol mattress of my mind & open up the windows to let the light in.  So to speak.

Yeah. I'm having issues with that.

Whilst my blog has taken on a clean, crisp & new appearance, my mind didn't get the memo & has instead remained in it's prior state of wallowing in it's own self-repugnance.

This morning at the Orthapedic clinic I felt myself sinking into a cesspool of jealousy (the very feeling that I am trying to STOP feeling) when realizing that I was the only 'be-crutched' patient in the whole clinic who had to come in alone, had no coffee or tea for the wait (carrying hot liquids on crutches is bad to one's health, I have discovered this week) AND, to add insult to injury, Twitter was virus-ed (like, when does that EVER happen?) just in my time of emotional need & vulnerability.

This left me wondering; How on EARTH did I get by before my tweeties?

Oh - and I also had this long & wonderful post typed out about how I downloaded BlogPress for my iPhone and will thusly be blogging much more often.... and then my phone glitched and I lost the whole damn thing.

AND all that was BEFORE the appointment, during which my poor knee was made to bend & twist in ways I try to avoid when I'm NOT injured.... and also before I was told that I may wind up having to have a scope surgery to investigate further what's wrong with my knee. 

So for today I'll leave it at this... I'm going to crawl into my fuzzy bathrobe, under my fuzzy blanket & try and keep my mind in fuzzy, warm thoughts.

And maybe tomorrow I'll have another fresh start.

NaVe goes back to the school of life!

So I didn't quite return to my blog with the gusto I had hoped for.

So sue me.

I led a fairly unblogworthy existance for the remainder of the summer. We went on one last camping trip to Pinery (and forgot our camera, but it should be arriving back soon thanks to U.P.S. and pictures will be posted!)

Now, it's fall... the crisp smell of leaves turning is back in the air, the mid-morning silence reminds me that all the kids are back in school, and it leaves me wanting a fresh start.

But this fresh start I desire is no where to be found. I have no fresh pile of books awaiting a semester of studying & highlighting. There's no supplies to be purchased for my bright & bubbling back-to-school-er either. I used to LOVE going back to school shopping, despite my uniform and ridiculous amount of ginormous textbooks to be purchased. And I still miss the annual "book sale" of my old high school, seeing everyone again, rushing around to find the least beat up copy of the texts you need, no uniforms left so there was always still that hint of summer in the air...) My old high school always had a really nice feel in the fall, many old and grand trees in the courtyards changing colours.... Fall and Christmas were my favourite times there. I can almost forget the bad parts about my high school years when I remember back to that 'fresh start' feeling.

But I digress.

This year there is no clear cut fresh start for me so instead I'm decidedly creating my own. Or, that was the plan before this unhappy knee adventure of mine (follow me on twitter if you wanna hear that daily whine/rant!).

So now I've got some time in couch city during which to plan this self-appointed fresh start.
I've been feeling really resentful, negative, bitter and jealous lately. I don't know exactly where it all started but it was really really starting to wear me down.

So this year, instead of going back to school I'm going back to basics and re-learning the lesson I used to live by.

Love + Laughter = Love.

Any thoughts?